Blame has the perverse effect of backfiring and being a primary obstacle towards obtaining a lasting solution1. “So, if I am not going to blame that idiot who caused all the problems, who am I to blame?” you ask. Since that last question suggests that blaming is a ‘need’ somewhere in the chain of relating,then may I suggest you blame yourself. Why?
Blaming someone else is done usually to give a subconscious lift to our own ego. As
soon as you blame someone else, it makes you blame-free regarding the incident and lifts you by absence of culpability. As well, those who accuse put themselves on a pedestal of superiority to the one being blamed.
“Because I am blaming you, I am better than you.” While such words are not used, they are implied. And they elicit the frequent response: “What makes you
think you’re so great?”
The point of this paper is how to get a quicker solution to a problem. And if you want to get the fastest and most complete solution possible, you have to stop blaming.
If your goal is to get a quick solution,
stop blaming. And if you want to blame,have the courage and the cleverness to blame
yourself.
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